MISCONCEPTIONS- Male son syndrome... whose fault?

"Witch! you have killed all your male babies and eaten them in your coven"  Mama Chigozie spat fiercely 

Oluchi ran upstairs crying, this was the norm in her house each time her mother in law came visiting. Marriage was a blessing but no one told her about the downsides that came with it.

"Chigozie please go down stairs and talk to your mum she's at it again" Oluchi said amidst tears

Gozie was furious, his mother always brought so much disarray each time she came visiting he had told her couple of times to stay away from his family matters but his mother would never listen

"Mama what's it again with you and my wife? is it not too early to start these fights?"

"i will continue to fight and make her life miserable. she has decided to turn you to a childless person and i won't take it!"

"mama childless? we have 3 girls, beautiful daughters for that matter... are they not children too"

" You call girls children? who will bear your name, who will inherit all these things you are working so hard for, who will take after your business name? or Gozie haven't you heard the Ibo adage, "o buru na enweghi onye ga anochite anya onye isi na ezinulo, o zughi o ke" ..."

"mummy, who said the family is never fully complete without an heir (translating the adage)? this adage you just used is probably centuries old. Times are changing nne and we should change with the time as well"

"nnam, please do something about this, that witch of a woman just gave birth to the third girl, all she has around her waist is female children... i know of Nkesi, the village choir, her sisters all have male children.. having male kids is in their gene you can make her your second wife so she'll bear you a male child just one male child is enough to wipe away this shame"

"mama don't get me angry please. What shame? if my wife didn't bear me any child you'd be the first person to castigate her; now she has three beautiful daughters and you are here talking about shame!" Gozie walked angrily away from his mother.

" I am leaving... i have passed my message across next time i'm coming to this house, i'll come with Nkesi and our kins men... they need to hear this too." mama Gozie walked out.

Gozie had gone upstairs to console his wife Oluchi... he didn't have any issue with the gender of his children. At some point when he was worried, his doctor had explained everything to him. This was his fault and not his wife's besides, he loved the girls so much they brought so much light into his life. Tamara his first daughter was 7 and she had the wisdom of a 15 year old, Kara was 4, her smartness was way out of this world, his new born baby Kaposi, was so beautiful every one nicknamed her 'ughegbe-oyibo'. His family was a complete one with a boy or not. He hated to see his wife go through this but even though he knew the truth, his entire village didn't. He was an only son and was expected to have an 'heir' who should be a male child.

Oluchi knew this wasn't the last of the insult she'd be receiving. she belonged to the association of Abriba women and she knew how the other women especially the older ones who'd been influenced by her mother-in law stared at her. That they didn't have a male child was not her fault. This last child, she had planned it so well... calculated her ovulation date and prayed so hard but it came out as a girl. The castigation she'd be facing made her have post-partum depression for weeks she'd stare at her baby and wish she was a boy or just die. It took her so much effort to pull through.

**********

Oluchi walked into the living room to see her in-laws all wearing the usual red caps and isiagu. she sighted a girl, a very young one sitting beside her mother-in law who had not even replied her greetings. Oluchi took the stairs to their bedroom hurriedly she laid on the bed crying. In Ibo land when the elders are fully gathered with a girl, that was the new wife. she had suffered with Gozie to build everything they had. Gozie was her life, her rock, hope, everything. Haven lost her both parents at a tender age, she had cleaved to Gozie when he came along and although he had never done anything to hurt her, this was one step he won't be able to talk himself out from.

"Baby please stop crying i'm going downstairs to educate those men and also talk some sense into them. I took a vow to honor, protect and uphold our union and i am not ready to give it all away he spoke softly"

"Okay dear she sniffed."

Gozie greeted everyone as he walked into his living room.... he allowed them talk. His uncles had accompanied his mother to bring him a new wife who would bear him a son..this was their purpose of visit.

"Thank you very much every one for showing so much concern about this matter. My wife is not a barren woman, we have three beautiful children... all girls, but i love them more than anything in this world.
Now to baring male children, i want to enlighten you all about this because while i was a bit concerned, i spoke with my doctor and i also read a lot on it. My concern wasn't so i'd pass blame to my wife though, i was concerned and eager to learn too so i thought knowing so much about the cause, would help me educate others or find a probable solution to it
.
Having a male child totally depends on us, the men... yes i mean we are the ones who give the women what they produce. God gave the women the XX chromosome. It's like an identification number meaning anywhere you see XX its a girl/woman. While the man XY chromosome meaning the XY stands for a man/boy. Notice that what differentiates the man from woman is the Y. When we have sex with our wives, we produce sperm these sperms have X or the Y chromosome. Now, my uncles, the woman who is Xx is waiting for any of the both chromosomes you have released to fertilize her XX chromosome. If the Y was fast enough, it'll join with one of her x to give XY(boy) if the X meets her first it'll join with one of her x to give XX(girl)" Gozie explained

"Hmmmm so how come some men have 4 boys and others 4 girls Gozie are you now saying some of us have more boys in us than girls?" his uncle queried

"Uncle, i'll say some men are more composed of the Y chromosomes, a study by one Newcastle University researcher Mr Gellatly using a family tree he found out that, The family tree study showed that whether you’re likely to have a boy or a girl is inherited. Men are more likely to have sons if they have more brothers but are more likely to have daughters if they have more sisters. However, in women, you just can’t predict it. 
A gene consists of two parts, known as alleles, one inherited from each parent. In his paper, Mr Gellatly demonstrates that it is likely men carry two different types of allele, which results in three possible combinations in a gene that controls the ratio of X and Y sperm;

• Men with the first combination, known as mm, produce more Y sperm and have more sons.
• The second, known as mf, produce a roughly equal number of X and Y sperm and have an approximately equal number of sons and daughters.
• The third, known as ff produce more X sperm and have more daughters.

The gene that is passed on from both parents, which causes some men to have more sons and some to have more daughters, may explain why we see the number of men and women roughly balanced in a population. If there are too many males in the population, for example, females will more easily find a mate, so men who have more daughters will pass on more of their genes, causing more females to be born in later generations...."

"Gozie, this is really educative o... so how will you advice men who want to have male children to go about it" his cousin who was seated quietly asked

"to Nonso and everyone, if you want a baby boy, there are three ways to go about it...

1. Use deep penetration and “rear entry” position which would allow the deposit of sperm very close to, or above the neck of your wife's cervix for quicker entry into her cervix where the environment is more alkaline and easier for male sperm to survive. (Translated, it means putting the ball almost on the goal line for the sharp shooter to just tap in and score)

2. Try and achieve heavenly feeling, at the same time as your partner. This helps to achieve a more alkaline environment that favors the “y” male sperm.

Think of male sperm as Usain Bolt- Fast but cannot last in a marathon like say, Haile Gebrselassie, the Ethiopian marathon runner. 

3. Ensure to track her ovulation. sex should be on the ovulation day or just a day after it... the fastest sperm carrying Y, die off easily as they expend their strength in the process. the X carrying sperm are more enduring. if you have sex with your wife days before she ovulates, the sperm carrying Y would be dead by the time she ovulates hence giving room for the X sperm to fertilize the egg. in all, prayers also matters.

4. You can also go for IVF. there is a process for gender selection.

METHOD 2. Stolkowski Method.

European Physician, Joseph Stolkowski Conducted studies wherein he correlated a mother’s pregnancy diet with the sex of her baby.

His Result: Women who ate foods rich in potassium and sodium (like meat, fish, vegetables, CHOCOLATE, and salt) beginning at least six weeks before attempting conception were far more likely to conceive a BOY.

Also, women who consumed foods high in calcium and magnesium,( such as milk cheese, nuts, beans, and cereals) beginning at least six weeks before attempting conception were far more likely to conceive a GIRL.

This method is already being used by a company called- ‘Smart Stork‘ (You can Google it) They have made so much money doing this for people….something you can do by yourself for free.

METHOD 3. SELNAS method.

Using Dr Stolkowski’s research, European biologist, Patrick Schoun discovered that the membrane surrounding a human egg also emits ions (an atom or molecule with an electric charge) giving off a type of electric “charge” of its own. According to him,its the energy that attracts either an “x” or “y” sperm.

He also found that at certain times in a woman’s monthly cycle, her egg is electrically “charged” to attract either the ”x” or “y” sperm exclusively. He also noted a “neutral” time in the cycle when the electrical charge surrounding an egg is dependent on environmental factors, including diet. So by coordinating your most fertile time (The 6 days before ovulation with the days when your egg is attracted to either the “x” or the “y” sperm, you can plan how to meet your partner to coincide with the conception of either a boy or a girl.

So, if you combine more than one of these methods, you should be almost guaranteed of the gender of your choice. You can also go on google to find out more on the last two methods"

"wow thank you so much Gozie, even though most of the terms were ambiguous for some people, we learnt a lot and i'll endeavor to pass this message across to others"  Nonso explained.

Gozie knew this was his freedom... he had bought his freedom by enlightening others... his marriage would be intact and he too would try some of these methods if they planned on having another baby. For now, let the child issue rest he was contented with his life.

"I'm so sorry my son, where is Oluchi i need to apologize to her"... his mother took the stairs to the bedroom....

light fades....


reference

1. Gellatly et al. Trends in Population Sex Ratios May be Explained by Changes in the Frequencies of Polymorphic Alleles of a Sex Ratio Gene. Evolutionary Biology, Dec 11, 2008; DOI: 10.1007/s11692-008-9046-3